“vrmm vrmm vrrrrrmmmmmm”

Do you remember the scene in Wind in the Willows when Toad takes Mole and Ratty out in his caravan and they get run off the road by a car? They crash into a ditch and the caravan is a wreck. Mole and Ratty are furious but toad is sitting in the middle of the dusty road with a glazed expression.

The Toad never answered a word, or budged from his seat in the road; so they went to see what was the matter with him. They found him in a sort of a trance, a happy smile on his face, his eyes still fixed on the dusty wake of their destroyer. At intervals he was still heard to murmur `Poop-poop!’

The Rat shook him by the shoulder. `Are you coming to help us, Toad?’ he demanded sternly.

`Glorious, stirring sight!’ murmured Toad, never offering to move. `The poetry of motion! The real way to travel! The only way to travel! Here to-day–in next week to-morrow! Villages skipped, towns and cities jumped–always somebody else’s horizon! O bliss! O poop-poop! O my! O my!’

I feel just like Toad today, because I’ve just discovered the real way to garden – with a chainsaw!

MJ regularly confirms with me that my using a chainsaw (and presumably chainsawing off a limb) is frowned upon. I’ve never really suggested that I would, but she reminds me often nonetheless. We’re running low on firewood, but have great logs all over the yard waiting to be cut down to size. I was going to find someone to hire to come and cut them up sometime today.

Just about an hour ago, I was trying to pull down an old tree with a tiny manual saw, Derryn saw me from across the back fence and came to help. He was able to break the tree out of the ground in about 30 seconds. Stupid boys. Always showing off. We took the tree to the wood heap and Derryn saw a hollow log and asked if he could have it for his bird aviary. Reluctant to let any of our most precious commodity go, I did a deal that he could have it if he chopped some of the logs with his chainsaw. He agreed and went back over the fence to get it. On his return he asked why I couldn’t use the chainsaw myself, and the 17 million times that I’ve promised MJ not to use it were quickly forgotten.

Seriously, it was the most fun ever!

Instead of “poop-poop” I feel like saying, “vrmm vrmm vrrrrrmmmmmm”.Take that trees! I’ll chop you ALL down!


5 thoughts on ““vrmm vrmm vrrrrrmmmmmm”

  1. Josh

    now I think MJ’s advice should be FOLLOWED!! Be careful!! More importantly, be taught what needs being careful of!!

    (The Wind in the Willows bit is great!)

  2. Lara

    You know how our farm was called ‘The willows’? Well my Mum had a big painting very similar to the one above (but of the horse draw cart) in my brothers bedroom (I don’t know if you remember it) and we had the book of the wind in the willows and I joined those three dots and assumed that the wind in the willows was about OUR house. It seemed feasible that someone had written the story about my place and my life and I was always on the lookout to see badger out there with the kangaroos!

  3. Sarah Fortuna Post author

    So true Lara! The river they boated on is obvs the creek!

    It’s like the time I thought that in one episode of the ghost busters cartoon they were coming to Rushworth because I assumed ‘Russia’ was just a nickname. Hadn’t figured out the concepts of recorded television, fiction, animation, or geography at that stage.

  4. Beck


    ha ha sorry….can’t comment…..still laughing…. (not at you of course Sarah…. WITH you……)

    that’s a good one!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s